Throughout 2019, I repeatedly told my husband that something didn't feel right. Like something really big was coming. I badgered him for months about leaving Los Angeles. Fortunately, I married a good man who took my intuition seriously. I put together a solid plan of action. We sold our place, bought a new one and packed up our life. In December, we left the city we'd been living in for twenty (plus) years and moved to a small town south of Raleigh, North Carolina. I'm immensely grateful we left when we did because 2020 has been a shit show. At least these days we have a view of a forest instead of the 10 freeway.
In the midst of a global pandemic, I finished some major rewrites for a book I wrote last year and decided it would be a great time to start querying agents. Nothing like the sting of rejection to accompany the fear, anxiety and confusion this year has provided. Is it ever a good time query? It's bad enough during "regular" seasons in life, but during this ... ouch.
Today I took the advice of my writing coach (Heather Demetrios) and refocused my attention on why I write. I worked on a writer statement because regardless of what happens with the queries or the world, I will always be a writer. I might never get a seat at the publishing table, but that doesn't mean I should stop writing. Over the years, I've endured hundreds of rejections from agents. I watched my successful self-publishing career crumble. I've written books that might not reach a reader's heart. But these things won't stop me from writing. Because I was made to write. It's what I do, no matter what.
"I write to give the words floating around in my head a place to exist. I write to remind myself that I exist. That we all do. I want to provide a safe and encouraging space for my readers to experience new journeys. To give them room to spread out their thoughts and fly. To see things from a different perspective. To wonder. To explore. I want my writers to feel how I do after I finish a good book--like they have just made a new friend in this ever-expanding universe."
- Simone Stier
If you're feeling stuck as a writer, I highly recommend Heather's Flow Lab. The course was a game changer for me. I was able to see the areas blocking me from enjoying my writing life. Through her guidance and well-thought instruction, I was able to create a writing practice that reflects sanity and brings joy.
Here's to hoping the second half of 2020 looks a lot better than the first half!